By Kevin Hymel, Arlington National Cemetery

On May 12, 2026, Arlington Lady Shelley Kimball stepped into an uncommon role when the family of U.S. Merchant Marine Galleyman-Utility Jose Pabon could not attend his memorial service at Arlington National Cemetery (ANC). Arlington Ladies attend funeral and memorial services to ensure that no soldier, sailor, airman, Coast Guardsman or Merchant Mariner is ever laid to rest or remembered alone. On this occasion, Kimball represented Pabon’s family.

Pabon lost his life during World War II, when a German U-boat torpedoed his Merchant Marine ship on July 25, 1944. It sank in the South Atlantic and none of the ship’s 69-member crew survived. Although Merchant Mariners risked their lives delivering cargo during the war, they were not considered eligible for military benefits until 1988.

By standing in for Pabon’s family, Kimball was fulfilling the spirit of the Ladies. Since 1948, the all-volunteer Arlington Ladies have been an official part of ANC funeral and memorial services, representing the service branch’s chief of staff or equivalent. Theypresent handwritten condolence cards to the primary next of kin, one from the chief (on behalf of the service branch) and one from the Arlington Lady.

Kimball, whose husband is a retired Coast Guard captain, volunteered to become an Arlington Lady because she wanted to support military families through all stages of their lives. “I have had the joy of standing by in some of the happiest times in families’ lives,” she said, “and I also wanted to be there for the hardest days.” She learned the importance of this commitment firsthand, when her own father was laid to rest at the cemetery and the Arlington Ladies supported her and her family.

At the memorial service, Kimball sat in the chair reserved for the family member who receives their loved one’s flag. Since the Merchant Marine does not have an honor guard or other assets for a military service, several military branches contributed. An Army caisson delivered the flag to the service in Section 13, a Navy band played “Eternal Father,” and a Coast Guard firing party fired three volleys while a bugler sounded Taps. U.S. Army Lt. Col. Tim Demerath stood at attention throughout the service, representing Army National Military Cemeteries leadership.

As a Coast Guard honor guard unfolded the flag and held it tight, Navy Chaplain (Lt. Cmdr.) Ian McCarthy recited prayers and thanked Pabon for his service to his country. “None of us knew him,” McCarthy said, “but he was a fellow citizen, a shipmate and he served his country with honor, courage and commitment.”

A Coast Guard officer presented the folded flag to Kimball. “It was a great honor,” she remarked. “I felt like his spirit was with us.” Although this was her first time representing a family at a service, she felt grateful to serve in the role. “All of us Arlington Ladies make sure that everyone is honored here at the cemetery,” she said. By stepping in for a fallen service member’s family, Kimball fulfilled the Arlington Ladies’ promise to ensure that this Merchant Mariner was not memorialized alone.